Well it’s either Lent or almost Lent, or, fuck, Lent might even be over by now. I don’t even know. Shit, I don’t even care. But, regardless, Lent is a funny thing. Millions of Christians, mostly Catholics, give up something as ridiculous as soda or candy for a while. Why? To identify with Me and My sacrifice for YOUR SINS. While those things might be yummy, I don’t think giving up a Snickers bar for a few weeks is equivalent to hanging on a fucking cross, bleeding to death and having My sausage flopping in the wind for all to see. If you’re one of these pricks, you can follow Vanna’s lead and
You see, I’m a little upset about this. My sheep are merely giving up things instead of, you know, doing things like helping the poor or helpless. Or, at the very least, they should be giving Me money. That helps, too.