Church of Jesus Fucking Christ

Throughout the Bible there are many instances of people being possessed by evil spirits. And don’t let those motherfucking doctors tell you it was actually diseases and disorders; no, those were real spirits trying to kill my minions. Trust Me.

Anyway, so today it appears one of My sheep found that his nephew was possessed, and he appropriately tried to rid him of the spirits. How? By cutting it out of him with a butcher knife. Unfortunately the child died.

This is appalling. Not really because he tried to cut the evil spirits out of the infant, but because everyone knows that in order to rid a baby of evil spirits, you need to violently shake it, not cut it! Idiot!