In the long fucking line of Christian sects that are really fuckin’ scary, Catholics have to take the cake. That’s right. Not the ones who argue against EVILution. Not the ones who passionately protest the flavor-issue of the week like abortion, homo marriage, or keeping a rotting, dead carcasses of a braindead whore alive. Instead, I think Catholics are the fucking scariest.
First there’s that douchebag Pope who rides around in his molestermobile. What a scary cocksucking son of a bitch. The guy to the right might not be the new Pope — who’s a fuckin’ Nazi, by the way — but he’s scary nonetheless. If this picture doesn’t scream “come here little boys and girls, I want to stick my finger in your butt,” I don’t know what does. Assbandit. That would be a much more appropriate title for this sick bastard.
Then there’s also the fact that in order to get close to kids, he dresses like Santa. Now I don’t know why his friends are hitting him with that golden penis, but I’m sure it’s some sort of pre-molestation, pro-Santa ritual. And what the fuck is up with the guy with the axe in the back? That’s probably to castrate any little boys who don’t want to be fondled. Sick fucks.
And let’s not forget the biggest reason they’re fucked up: it’s part of their service to drink my blood and eat my flesh. I could have sworn cannibalism went out of style at least by the time bellbottoms came around. Apparently not. And even worse, they’re teaching their children eat me as young as age 7! It sickens me to think what body part all of these cocksucking faggots imagine they’re eating.
The next time you see a Catholic, do Me a favor and punch him in the sack in the name of your Lord.