Those fucks over at God Hates Shrimp think they’re being funny by coming out to My sheep’s protests against homo marriages. What they don’t realize is that despite their horrid attempt at wit and satire, I truly hate shrimp. Know why? They smell like vaginas.
And, in case you don’t remember, I don’t like vaginas. Not only do they smell like shrimp, but they don’t look all that aesthetically pleasing, either. Much like a retarded clam, really. That’s why My Dad and I have demanded Our
minions sheep encourage abstinence. We don’t want anyone getting too close to one of those nasty, little things and losing a finger.
Despite the Bible’s depiction of My birth, My Mom didn’t even have a vagina. I was actually born from her ass. “Gross,” you might say, but at least I didn’t come out smelling like rotting seafood.
So here’s a big FUCK YOU to all of you pro-homo God Hates Shrimp pricks. And stay away from vaginas.