Have you ever noticed that My most devout sheep are often some of the ugliest people around? Just stay up late one night and in between those phone fucking commercials you’ll see one about music devoted to Me and My Dad. Look at the crowd; they’re a bunch of ugly fucks. Sometime you can’t even tell the difference between a girl’s face and her vagina. They really are that gross.
I mean look at Ted Haggard, for instance. What an ugly son of a bitch. And not only is he a disgusting looking fuck, he also likes to smoke meth off of faggot prostitutes. What’s amazing is that it took so long for that to come out; I knew that the second I saw that retard’s face. His face just screams “I have a poopy penis.”
Plus, look at his left eye. It shuts slightly more than his right eye. The only reason that happens is from a disease called “Cockinmyfuckingeyetus.” Obviously his gay lover tried teabagging him in the face, only to poke out his eye with his dick. This is the sort of shit that really makes Me against gay marriage. You know, besides the part that they inherently can’t love.
So if you’re a devout reader of this blog, it’s likely you’re a disgustingly ugly bastard. And if you are, I’d like to ask that you please not fuck. There are too many ugly people as it is, and we certainly don’t need any more ugly, evangelical retards running around.
Praise be to Me.